Three-peat November, gummy bears and loaf bread...13.1, 26.2, 50k...

The joys of running, hundred mile weeks, a gummy bear sandwich, anyone....and a three-peat all in the month of November in 2013.

It goes without saying that running is my most favorite thing to do in the history of ever. Four and a half years ago, on my 36th birthday when I decided that I wanted to add "run a marathon" to my bucket list, little did I know how running would impact my life, aid in my own self discovery, broaden my horizons, help me overcome and deal with many things in my life and become a vital part of my being.  To anyone thinking if starting running, be warned, running will change your life. 

The month of November has always been a favorite month of mine, besides Halloween, Thanksgiving is a favorite holiday of mine. November is always a month filled with races, and extra distance can be gotten in as temperatures are quite nice, another benefit, the beautiful scenery. 

I digress just a tad back to a Friday in November, just a random one I decided to take off work, so I could get in  some extra miles.  So I started out my front door, my usual route, water bottles dropped like Easter eggs along my way, and off I go. Half mile in I notice, a guy running on the opposite side of the road. He asked if he could run with me. I asked him if he was Ray. I responded yes as we had met at the Harbison 50K in January, my first attempt at an ultra, which I completed.  I replied sure. Then he asked how far I was going. I said that I didn't know, I just go on feel, if I feel good? I keep going, feel bad, I loop back home. He said ok and we took off. 23 1/2 miles later, he dropped me at my house and then went on to run back to his house.   Honestly, thought that'd be the only time I'd have the company of Ray while running. 

If you don't know who Ray Krolewicz is, google the name and find out why it was perfect timing, but isn't that just life? Here's a quote from a Kung Fu movie: "When the student is ready, the teacher will appear." And so he did. 

So began a fast friendship, coaching advice and guidance toward the pr streak of November and as I was reminded, the month isn't over yet.  

Governors Cup 11/09/13

Couple days before the race, I decided to sign up. Talked to Ray and said I want a pr, asked him would he pace me. He said he'd bandit in a run with me. And so he did. The race was pretty uneventful, felt easy, and I did pr ~ 1:48:15 on a really tough, hilly course. I came in 40th overall, 4th in my age group, all after having run 100 miles during the week where most people taper. 

During the race I commented to Ray that I had just pr'd across the board on the way to a half marathon. I was thrilled. 

The week following, I felt so good, my running continued to get stronger, not being sore and just the love to run, I saw my next carrot. I wanted to go do Charlotte Thunder Road  Marathon. I ran it by Ray as I didn't want to do something stupid before the 50k that was planned for November 23, Mad Marsh. He said if you want to do it, sign up and do it. Well, imagine my dismay when I clicked on register now on the website and "registration closed" popped up. I was crushed. 

Then, I get an email from Ray, he told me what to say in an email to the race director, requesting late registration. I emailed the race director on Wednesday evening. 

I had my fingers crossed, wished on everything I knew I could wish in and sat on the edge of my seat. Thursday morning, went for my run, got home checked my email. I had a response. I was in!!!! 

I booked a hotel, called my friend and Super Sherpa, Laura Howell and asked if she wanted to road trip on Friday after work. She was willing to come along for the ride. 

Charlotte Thunder Road Marathon 11.16.2013 

This would be my third time running the marathon in Charlotte, I ran the half once. I knew the course, knew when to push and I knew it rolled. Hills! Hills! My breakfast daily and my favorite, favorite type course of all time. 

This race to was pretty uneventful (meaning I ran, no stomach issues, never walked a step) the support is fantastic, highly recommended for anyone who has never done it.  Charlotte peeps stop their cars and cheer runners on, they don't try to plow runners over...imagine that.

Finish time; 4:00:39 after another 100 mile week. I finished in the top 1/3 of the race overall, 13th out of 60 in my age group and 70th out of 286 females. 

Recovery run the Sunday after, I felt like I was flying. No soreness and I was so jacked on adrenaline....and looking so forward to the 50k the next weekend. 

Mad Marsh 50k

11.23.2013

Beaufort, SC

I had decided I want to hunt down another pr. I'm racing against myself and trying to improve me, not worried about anyone's times. 

I have my Crew chief with me, my seventeen year old daughter, Hannah. We check into our hotel after driving down.  Drive over to packet pick up, map out how far to the race course we are and decide on dinner.  I'm going over our game plan. I have everything mixed up, packed in a cooler and waiting for the next morning.

Ray had said he may come down, may not be at the start but hopefully would be there before the finish. 

Hannah and I had dinner. She said she really wanted to go back to the hotel and just relax and watch movies. Perfect evening for me, and ended up for her.  We were both asleep by 8. 

4:00 comes pretty early. I was relaxed, showered, woke her up and we left. 

It was dark at the start, I had never run in the dark, not on a trail with a flash light. I sat her chair up, made sure she was ok, knew what to do for me and then I hear, hello Pam. It was Ray. He said I'll join you on the last few loops. Introduced him to Hannah, they both photographed the day. 

6:30 start time.

Seven 4.5 mile loops, trail, flat, and hot and humid. Beaufort has no mercy, even in November, Charlotte the week before was 47 degrees and overcast, pretty close to no humidity.  And the governors cup, 30 something, also great running conditions.

So needless to say, it was hot. The loops seemed to fly by, so fast I being so excited about running, feeling like an animal uncaged getting to run, took off. Third loop in, I had only taken in one gel, stupid rookie mistake, due to conditions, hadn't stayed hydrated enough. 

Then Ray stepped in and said he was taking over. I told him I was hungry. He said eat. I had a couple potatoes, no effect. Next loop, and here's where the gummy bear sandwich comes into play. When I came through this time, I couldn't find Hannah, she was there, had not moved, but my brain was gone, lack of what?!?!? Sugar. For whatever reason I can to tolerate peanut butter, makes me throw up, I was on the hunt for just bread, or a plain bagel. Ray found a piece of loaf bread, best thing I ever, just plain old bread. I ate it like it was steak, then some gummy bears. Oh sweet Jesus, who'd ever thought gummy bears and white bread would be race food of choice! On the next loop, which was 23+ I felt better than I had the earlier loops, every loop I was getting stronger at the end. I was given a time limit I had to down these fluids. I was doing it. I had started having chills, no nausea though, so fluids were increased more. 

Then the race turned into a game. Landmarks were being set, people were in front of me, Ray running beside me, singing, talking and challenging me. He said start collecting pink socks. He'd say 5 people ahead, reel em in. On my last loop, I moved up twelve places in the race. I was heading into a pr. Ray would say, there's your next group, close in. Close in and pass. And I did. From miles 23 to 31.5 I felt better than I had during the first half of the race.  And I did just that, I pr'd 

5:53:46. 

I was so happy, grateful my daughter had been my crew chief, thankful for my end of race pacing from Ray and that he took over nutrition, for me. 

So there was the three-peat. 

Hannah said she had fun, that time went by fast. Ray had given her his camera to use and she photographed mid race set of photos. She has a good eye. 

I drove back home, she slept, she had to work Saturday evening. I wasn't sore, not stiff, just sleepy. 

I went to bed early, so when she came in from work, she came in my room, rubbed my back and asked if I was sick and if I was in pain. I responded that I was just sleepy and that I was fine. She was taking care of her mom.

So now comes Sunday morning...and the waterworks begin. I sat on the side of my bed. Face in my hands, elbows on my knees and sobbed uncontrollably. I knew what this was and had already planned races in the future, but they seemed so far away. I just cried. Post pardum race depression.  I have experienced this before.

My recovery run helped subside it. And again, I'm not sore. There's something magical about 100 mile weeks. But even more magical is the runners high, that feeling of being able to fly...adrenaline, sweet adrenaline...my drug of choice. 

Running has changed me forever, makes me a better person. 

This year has been a roller coaster of a ride for me, so what do I do? Lace up my shoes of course and run off the bad and run toward the good. Smile, cry, laugh, and talk it out. 

The good has definitely outweighed the bad, I have my mom, our relationship is stronger than ever. I wouldn't change that for the world.

Life is good, November has been good to me, the road my best friend and finding out just what I'm made of, priceless. And there's still so much to discover about me, after all running is personal to me...

Gummy bear sandwich anyone?

A 50K, someone to prove wrong and a pinky promise that couldn't bemade...

It started out a morning, a cold morning, the moon shining bright. The crisp air was a tad bit too crisp, it was a warm (insert sarcasm) 22 degrees at start time. The sun rose quickly over the park as about 100 people or so were waiting to embark on a journey a lot of us had never conquered, and believe me, it was something to conquer.

Dan, the race coordinator, asked for a show of hands who was running an ultra for the first time, many hands went up, including mine. Surprisingly I was not nervous, I was excited. Excited to begin a new challenge, a new adventure, and to prove someone wrong, my father. In an older post I wrote about our conversation at Christmas where he asked me if I quit during a particular race. My response, (I controlled myself really well because in all honesty I wanted to crawl across the table and punch him) was that I don't quit.

And though, dear god, I wanted to quit so many times during that race, because I was tired, there was no way in hell I would. I had to prove him wrong and I did.

Saturday morning, my mother in law and Nik accompanied me to the race. It was cold as I mentioned before, a bonfire was blazing as we parked and walked to the finish line. The warmth it put off was much appreciated. Familiar faces started to appear, William Schmitz, Greg Howell or Coach G as I refer to him, and Jim Morris. William and Greg were racing, Jim volunteering. My best friend Lori was meeting me at the midway point to run with me through the last half. She and her husband, Greg showed up a couple hours after the start, thank god.

The National Anthem was played by Dan's son, and Slash style rendition on an electric guitar. Though non-traditional, a lump still formed in my throat. The sun was beginning to rise, the darkness to brighten and the cold was lingering. It was almost start time. There was a 10 hour cut off. It was the beginning of a very long, but fantastic day, one that will not be forgotten soon.

As the race began that morning, I could not possibly fathom the events of the day. It was a distance I had never been, and the tale tell wall of mile 20, the taboo of races, will I hit, will I not, stayed in the back of my mind. Then the reality hit that I had about 11-12 miles more to go past that...until I reached that point I couldn't even begin to know what I was up against. Would I be able to run after a certain point, would I be able to walk, would I have to walk to finish, god forbid.

I get my good game smack on the butt from Nik, a kiss and good luck. I get my good game text from Laura. At this point a swell of pride and zap of adrenaline and I headed into the woods, a point of no return until I cross the finish line. No turning back for this girl, I am no quitter.

I had agreed to take my cell phone with me on this run, in order to let Nik know that I was doing ok and the progress through the course. Poor guy, it is torture for him to wait, he is always a bundle of nerves. His mom came with us today, she gave up her whole Saturday as well to wait on me to make a dream of mine come true.

Being new to me, the ultra distance, I was not at all aware of what I was heading into...the abyss. The sun was shining, the course well marked, my feet were ice blocks, my hands were frozen, but I was smiling. Let the adventure begin.

Aid stations were set up roughly every four miles or so, those would be a child's delight! Aid stations in Ultras are so completely different than water stops in other races. Similarly compared to Ironman style set ups, except that there is candy galore, cubed baked potatoes, pb and j sandwiches, soups, chili, cookies, fruit, bowls of salt, salt caps, and ibuprofen, like a dream.

I had on my camelbak, the water was freezing in the tube, if that gives any indication of how cold it was. I had packed my camelbak with some nutrition as I had no idea what my time was going to be like to get to the next stop. Thankfully so, I needed it. The potatoes rolled in salt were my saving grace along with the oranges and bananas. At one stop I had a pb and j, bad decision, I started to burp it up. That subsided soon enough, then stomach issue began and feeling crampy. That's when I started eating potatoes and salt. The stomach issue subsided, as well as the pending feeling of cramps. All I'm going to say is thank god for baby wipes, and that I was insistent upon taking them along in my pack.

The course out into the forest was beautiful. This particular course was a double loop, so I knew what to expect having been out here before but, not for two loops. The first half though it was slow was the relaxing part. I felt pretty good, I was about 5 miles in before I could feel my feet. My hands never warmed up. I didn't fall, climbed over trees that were down in the path, jumped across streams, sludge pits is more like it, and felt alive. My ankles and knees started to hurt and ironically it hurt worse to walk than to run.

Calling Nik every time I got to an aid station, was comforting for the both of us. Seeing a familiar face at the one aid station was comforting and at one point he, Jim, handed me a paper towel to wipe my runny nose. He sympathized with me when I said to him that this whole thing sucks, it's harder than the half-ironman that I did. When I got back to the 16 miles start of the second loop, Nik, Greg Tucker and Lori were waiting on me. Lori had agreed to do the second loop with me, I was so happy to see her. I had been running by myself for a great deal of the race, talk about mentally taxing, dead silence. Self doubt had been creeping in at that point but I could not quit dammit, my father could not be right. I had to finish, run, walk or crawl, I had to finish.

As we start back into the woods, the second time, I was so happy to have company, someone to talk to, someone so that I wasn't alone. We joked about feeling like we were the lone survivors of the apocalypse. Running from Zombies, in those woods, not place to go except around the trails, back and forth and over rocks and proving to myself that I can go further than a marathon distance.

When we got back to the same aid staton where I had just picked Lori up from, we both ate. We were at mile 20, the dreaded mile 20 in a marathon, the wall. In a marathon I'm always thinking to myself "yahoo, I made it to 20 and screw you wall I'm not hitting you today!" However in an ultra, there's more than a 10k left, like in the marathon, there's almost two 10k, a little shy of another half marathon. Unimaginable or so I thought, and admittedly I wanted to quit. I feet hurt, my tendons hurt, my knees sounded like rice crispy treats, I was cold, I was tired, but I was not, I repeat, not tired of running. I was just exhausted.

Lori and I got back to the dreaded Spider Woman trails 1&2, to me those are the toughest ones out there and I had to do them twice. Most of it was walked but I don't care in the least, technically it is hard. Seriously I'm going to set up a field trip so people can see what all of us spent our Saturday running on, it makes Sesquicentennial Park look like you're running on the sidewalk.

I remember telling Lori once when we were maybe 27 miles or so in, that I'm doing it, I have passed the marathon distance. I realized it was possible for me. We got to an aid station, 3 and 1/2 more miles. A guy on the course who had nothing to do with the race was a total ass. He spoke and said boy you still have a long way to go. He was on his bike and had I the energy at that point, I would have pushed him off the cliff. There's always got to be that one asshat. Moving on, I called Nik to let him know I had 3 and 1/2 miles left. He was surprised with how good I sounded and it wasn't an act. I was really ok, excited to be finishing soon and impressed that I could still run. I also told him that if he had to leave to go that I understood. Saturday night, there were fights at the Township. Many of the guys from our gym were fighting and he was cornering them so he had to go to the pre-fight meetings and such so there was a good chance he wouldn't see me finish. I knew he was leaving at 3:30. I tried my best to make it in that time. Needless to say, he didn't see me finish.

We round the corner, one uphill, two more lefts and then the finish line. The second left came and in the distance I could see two people standing there, it was Jim and Laura. I had four friends run me in that day. I asked Laura how much further, she said through those trees, there's the clearing and the finish. So I ran, Lori ran, Laura and Jim ran. I could see it, there it was plain as day, the finish, or should I say the "FiN" and a long line spray painted on the ground. I see it, the open field, no more trees, no more, trails to stay on, the end. A smile started to creep onto my lips, a full toothy grin that I somehow mustered up.

I had done it, I had proved him wrong, I finished, I finished it all. Before even getting my medal, I took my phone off my arm and called Nik. I said I'm done. I had finished at 3:31. I missed him by a minute.

I looked at William, Greg, Laura, Lori and Jim and said if I ever say I'm doing another ultra, please remind me of today, 1/5/13. I used a very bad expletive and said (insert really bad f word here) Ultras!

That was the hardest thing I've ever done to date. I hurt, a lot. My knees and ankles hurt. I was thirsty. I was exhausted but I was elated. I was greeted by the most welcoming, supportive group of people I know. I was adrenalin charged. I was thinking how disappointed I would have been had I given at the half way point. I would have been crushed.

I remember Lori telling me that several people did in fact quit at the half way point, she had witnessed it while she was waiting on me at the second loop. That day, Lori took my hand to help me over a log as I groaned. She said to me, " you know I love you, I would never do this for anyone else." As I type this, I'm tearing up because I know exactly what she meant. She put herself out there for me, risked hurting herself, as it is dangerous out there, to help me achieve my dream of running an ultra. She wouldn't even cross the finish line, she stepped off and stood by her husband as I finished. Greg said now there's your best friend, to come out here and do this with you. I agree whole heatedly.

On that day, Saturday, January 5, 2013, through those woods and every pain I had, I felt more alive and at peace than I had for months. Every time I venture out to do something new, to reach the new goal, chasing the next high, I learn more about myself than I knew before. The journey truly is the reward.

That night I went to the fight. I managed to shower and eat and even dry my hair and put on makeup. I was going to support the husband who always supports me. Thankfully our friends, Mark and Bre, were going to the fight and offered me a ride. All our fighters won. It was a great Saturday for both of us.

Sunday when Nik and I were standing in the kitchen, he asked me to pinky promise, no more ultras. I laughed, he said seriously pinky promise. Those are serious and cannot be broken. So, I would not pinky promise. He laughs and said, "I knew it, you adrenaline junky." He then said at least no craziness for a while.

We had a celebratory meal at Arizona Steakhouse on Sunday evening. During the meal we talked about how our Saturday had gone. During the conversation, I said I needed those toasty hands glove inserts for when I do it next year.

Less than twenty-four hours after the ultra, I knew I would be revisiting it again. It was another incredible moment in my life.

I had the greatest people in the world to share it with. When I showed up at the fight, congratulations from all our other friends were offered up. One guy came over to say he thought Nik had made a typo on his Facebook status about my 50k. He apologized and said that is insane.

I agree, it is insane. I am thankful my body held up, she's pretty amazing but what got me through that day was grit, heart and support of those around me.

I found the following quote on the Internet and it is so true. I learned what I was made of and what I am not...a quitter.

I made Nik promise me that if I ever told him I wanted to quit a race, to make me finish unless I was physically injured, like something broken and not just my spirit. He swore to me he will. Man, I love that guy.

"Perhaps the genius of ultrarunning is its supreme lack of utility. It makes no sense in a world of space ships and supercomputers to run vast distances on foot. There is no money in it and no fame, frequently not even the approval of peers. But as poets, apostles and philosophers have insisted from the dawn of time, there is more to life than logic and common sense.

The ultra runners know this instinctively. And they know something else that is lost on the sedentary. They understand, perhaps better than anyone, that the doors to the spirit will swing open with physical effort. In running such long and taxing distances they answer a call from the deepest realms of their being -- a call that asks who they are ..."
- David Blaikie

Just one more thing...dream big, set sights high...anything is possible, you just have to want it and be willing to put in the time and effort.

12/28/2012

Just one day after the year in review, an amendment needs to be made. There has been a bit of a disappointment that has come my way, via telephone and though I was just about on Cloud 9 with how things are progressing in my life, (insert screeching tires here), I believe I see a pattern starting to develop.

I digress. As many of you who have read this blog over the years, relationships with my family have not always been the greatest and I'm sure that by posting this blog, I will be stepping on some toes. Solution for that is maybe they shouldn't read my blog.

I was in therapy and when I discussed some issues with my therapist she said , it's your abuse, how you remember it, how things happened to you and nobody else. That being said this is my side of the story, take it or leave it and it is not up for discussion. I'm willing to bet that I have at least one person who can vouch for me too, so the disclaimer has been interjected.

As i expressed before in the previous blog, I have been working on my relationship with my daddy. I also made mention of his animal farm, better described as a hoard. The reason we had stopped communication the last time was every time I went to visit he wanted me to bring a truck load of hay to him which he was supposed to reimburse me for but that never happened. Goff Feed and Seed is located up the street from my house so at first it was not a big deal as I would go visit and drop the load except for the problem of not being reimbursed for the purchase of the hay.

I said all that to say this, today I was running with my friend Jeremy. Anybody who knows me knew where I was so when my phone kept ringing I stopped to check it. It was Daddy. He didn't leave a message so after I finished my run, thawed from the cold and started making my way to do some errands I needed to do, I called him back. First time, no answer so I thought maybe he was just seeing if we were coming for a visit. I keep my phone on vibrate most of the time, so when he called back, I didn't hear it go off. So I returned his call again, phone tag at its finest.

When I finally got him on the phone, he told me that he was looking for the number to Goff Feed and Seed, that he had misplaced it, but that he had found it. Any way the next statement was that hay is $7.50 a bale and that he would have to save up to get enough money to buy what he needed for his animals. Red flag went up. He didn't ask me to pick it up for him yet, but I'm sure it's coming. I refuse this time. I will not be used, it doesn't make me happy.

I have come to the sad conclusion that relationships come with a price. What I don't understand is that I guess I expect too much from people. I didn't think we would be going down this same road again and I can promise you there is a way off this road.

Why can't people just be a part of my life, to be just that, a part of my life, not to want monetary things from me. All I want is a small portion of his time, some interest in what's going on in my life. I was a daddy's girl growing up. I am truly at a loss.

Surrender the ladle and the adventures of Christmas 2012

From Halloween until Christmas, has been a roller coaster of a ride, sometimes hands in the air yahoo sort but other times, stop the world I want to get off type. Any way we have made it to today, December 27 (Yes, we lasted past the end of the world 12/21/12 which just happens to be my oldest daughter Brittany's birthday!)

I will digress to give some back story and go back further than even Halloween to give an adequate bird's eye view of our year, then we will skip ahead to the present.

The year began as any other year. "Happy New Year," cheers, whistles and kisses. Skip ahead, I did two marathons in three weeks, crazy, yes, but was a great experience. Two days after the last one, Nik and I flew to Vegas to train with Kong and of course to eat a belly full of Thai food.

Nik celebrated his birthday in the middle of the above mentioned events and the trip to Vegas was part of his birthday gift. Of course we had a blast, got our butts kicked. We met up with a couple from here, Mark and Bre, got to see Cirque de Soliel and eat at my favorite restaurant there The Top of the World. It was a great time.

Then May came around and my oldest daughter Brittany decided that she was moving to Holland, as in Amsterdam as in 4500 miles away. May was sort of an emotional month for me. She left the week before Mothers Day, it was tough. Even tougher was that I didn't hear from her for a solid week and was terrified. Upon receiving a call from her where I was asked why I was upset, I could tell she was oblivious. After I had calmed, I completely understand why she left, she has wanderlust just like her mom. Truthfully had I not been a mom at 17, I probably would have done the same thing.

My birthday rolled around and a trip to Puerto Rico followed, my favorite place on earth. I celebrated turning 39 there. Anybody who knows me at all, knows my fascination about turning forty so, yahoo!! I'm another year closer.

Pretty even keeled for the next couple months, Nik decided to go full time at the gym, Sor Sumrit and all is going well until October 31.

We had just gotten back from celebrating our first wedding anniversary in Puerto Rico, getting settled back to reality when the gym catches on fire due to a faulty heater exploding. Thank goodness nobody was in the gym at the time, and though the damage was devastating, we still had each other and our house. All I can say about getting the gym back up and running, was only by the help of a few great friends who have made such a huge impact on us, we could never repay them.

At exactly the same time that the fire department was on the way to our house, my mother was being rushed via ambulance to the hospital. She had an aneurism in her heart and at the time there was no clue what was happening. She ended up being in CVICU for close to two weeks.

Reminder: we are still on the same day, October 31, 2012, the longest day of my life.

Thanksgiving came around, it definitely didn't feel much like the holidays as I had been slammed at work, Nik had been getting classes built back up and having to deal with everything going on all around us.

I, up until this point, had not had a meltdown. My stress level was about a thousand percent, my swim coach would only let me swim freestyle laps, by myself. Every time, I would end up swimming around two to two hours and fifteen minutes, just back and forth. during that time I was able to be at peace.

Running was my other saving grace. Thank goodness for my friend, Lori who is crazy enough to say, twenty miles sounds fun.

After Thanksgiving the meltdown occurred, or as Nik likes to call it, full on turtle mode. I don't talk, I usually cry, a lot.
When road miles don't work anymore and swimming laps don't work, Muay Thai has been exhausted, a girl's just gotta cry. I knew when I was sitting watching "How I Met Your Mother" and started tearing up it was happening.

It was a Friday morning, Nik said are you supposed to run today, because you need to. I said no, I have twenty tomorrow and ten Sunday. He said good, you need all those miles. I told him I was going to see my friend, Laura. She was waiting on me at her house and I swear as soon as I stepped through her door, the waterworks started. I talked and cried, cried on her shoulder and she just listened, no advice given. The turtle was gone, I was exhausted, but I did feel better. I am so thankful to have her in my life.

Hannah's birthday came and went, I still can't believe she is seventeen years old. Brittany's birthday came and went, this was the first year I have celebrated with her. This year was also the first for her not being here over the holidays, which made me sad but she has to live her own life.

The past few months I have been working on two relationships, with my sister and daddy.

On Thanksgiving we dropped by my dad's after having been to my mother in laws with my mother and her husband. He showed us around his farm. Serious animal hoarder there, but it keeps him active.

During the time that my mother was in the hospital, my sister came down and stayed with me. Though the circumstances weren't great for us to spend much time together, we enjoyed each others company immensely. I decided I wanted to go and visit her in Fayetteville over Christmas holidays.

Work was crazy (not complaining at all, I enjoy what I do) which did not permit much running or swimming, funny because I am supposed to be tapering for an upcoming event. Things always workout that way.

The last day at work was 12/21, 12/22 after lunch we headed up to my sister and brother in laws house in Fayetteville. My sister and I were so super excited, see what you don't know is that over the past eight years that she has lived there I had never visited. I reserved a hotel room at the Hilton there for Saturday and Sunday night and we were set.

Saturday morning, Nik taught and I ran with one of my best friends, Lori. We had a great run though it was freezing, 18 miles on the books for us.

Nik and I loaded up and we were off. Surprisingly traffic was not bad, we made great time, checked into our hotel and got dressed to go to my sister's house and to dinner that night at Carrabba's with her and her family. Dinner was fabulous, their treat, and dear lord the sangria there was to die for.

We went back to our hotel, slept. Had breakfast and then...went to the gym on Sunday morning.

In the afternoon we went to my sister's home and roasted hot dogs and s'mores over the fire. We baked cookies and pinwheels, drank some wine and chit chatted like the old days. And guess what was on tv, Ironman Championships 2012. We all watched it together, questions followed and I answered gladly. It was a nice treat to have them interested in something that I love.

We ended up heading out early Monday, Christmas Eve, to get back home before the masses were on the road. We made good time back home, no traffic again.

Devyn and Alex came by for a brief visit. They were talking to us about their upcoming wedding and job and such grown up stuff. They were surprised with their Christmas loot.

Christmas morning we decided we were going to volunteer somewhere, I asked a friend and found a local place so we headed out at 9:30 to go lend a hand. One of the guys from the gym came with us to volunteer.

I was armed with a scoop, Josh with a slotted spoon and Nik with a ladle. In an hour and a half that we were on the line over 500 plates were dipped. It was incredible to be part of something so small that means so much. We were thanked for giving up our Christmas morning, I had nothing else to do, it didn't feel like a sacrifice to me at all. Actually it made me feel more in the Christmas spirit than I had previously.

Other people showed up to volunteer at 11:45 so we were forced to surrender our utensils, stupid I thought but we did and we headed off to our other Christmas festivities.

1:30- Christmas lunch at my Daddy's. the food was fabulous, all veggies were grown in his garden which made them phenomenal. I enjoyed my food very much and the conversation. Except one comment that got under my skin. He asked me about my running after I made the comment to Nik that I was going to have to run 40 miles to burn off this food. Daddy asked me how far I had run? I told him, then I told him about my half ironman. He said you quit didn't you? Pissed me off to be truthful, but I said no sir, that is one thing I am not is a quitter. Conversation moved on. Sad he doesn't really know me at all.

He took us out to show us his chickens again and to feed the donkey. We left soon there after to go to Nik's mom's house for our next Christmas stop. She made finger foods which was a nice change from the big full meals we are accustomed to. We spent sometime with her and then left to go pick up Hannah from her dad.

Hannah was excited to open her presents that Santa had left her, mostly Bob Marley stuff. We just relaxed that night, Nik, Hannah and me, by the fire.

At the end of the day, we were tired, had full bellies, and were happy. What a full few months, a roller coaster of a ride, learning what is important, family and true friends, and the pursuit if happiness.

Whatever happiness means..

My definition follows:

-having a great family whether matching DNA or not
-loving what you do for a career
-raising functional children who can take care of themselves
-having food in the pantry
-being able to help others
-being and having great friends
-being physically active
-trying to mend relationships
-loving myself
-accepting myself
-finding new challenges
-learning something new every day


In a nutshell...loving every aspect of my life, accepting that it is far from perfect but it is serendipitous and I wouldn't want it any other way. The pieces of the puzzle and every person in it make it complete, there are more pieces yet to be added and I'm certain some will be removed, such is life.

I welcome, open armed 2013, a year of simplifying, reevaluation and self discovery with my own happiness project. This year I will have aged forty years, I will acquire more laugh lines, less frown lines while cultivating this thing called life. I hope to inspire more people to make changes, to be a positive example to others which helps my own personal growth.

Bring it on 2013!

Happy Holidays and Happy New Year

Charlotte Thunder Road 11/17/2012

Saturday, November 17, 2012
7:45 am
Charlotte, NC
Thunder Road Marathon 

The second time I have been here for the marathon distance. Third time total, once for the half marathon distance where I fell in love with this race.  But the romance truly blossomed at mile 20 ½ in December 2010, when I completed my first full marathon.  That is the dreaded wall that any runner talks about hitting or hoping not to hit when it comes to the old 26.2 mile marathon distance.  

In 2010, it was my race, I had done endless miles, crossed trained endless hours, nothing had stopped me from getting close to my goal of 4:00 marathon time.  When I started that morning, I told Nik by at the start, told Lori and Cindy, to wait at the finish line and I was off.  Before I left I told Nik that I would see him between 4:00 and 4:15 and I did just that.  I crossed the finish line at 4:10:13.  It was a glorious day with much pain after, but I was on cloud nine.

Fast forward to October 31, 2012, the day that a wrench got thrown into everything.  Listen, I am in no way making excuses for not getting in my run training but Nik and I both put our lives on hold. At 8:30 or so that morning our gym caught fire due to a faulty heater that exploded.  Lucky for us, our house didn’t go up and neither was no one injured.  But on my gosh, the damage do to smoke and fire was incredible, I did what I could to help and Nik worked tirelessly on rebuilding with help from some great people and now the gym is currently back in operation.  The next thing that was going on at the same exact time, my mother was being rushed to the Heart Hospital at Richland Memorial due to an aneurism in her heart.  She spent the next week and a half in ICU.

Skip ahead to Saturday, November 17, 2012, it is 7:25 in the morning and we are meeting Lori and her husband in the lobby of the hotel.  

My dearest friend, who is crazy enough to sign up for races with me.  Our friendship blossomed after I asked her over three years ago about helping me check off a bucket list goal of running a marathon before I turned forty.  She had been my client for years, had spoken of running often, so I asked if she would be interested in training with me.  Believe it or not she had and still does live about four miles from me, coincidence? I don’t think so.  And that is where it began, we have missed I think three runs the entire three years and three months, only because one of us was out of town.  

It is freezing, 34 degree and the north wind at 15 mph is blowing, of course a head wind…wouldn’t expect anything different.  Embrace the suck.  Charlotte’s Thunder Road Marathon is a hilly course, but I love this course and the scenery is beautiful.  Here is how the day went to the best of my knowledge, some thoughts could be impaired by endorphins or utter loopiness from the runners high.  

We start.  I had told Lori to run her own race. I don’t think it is fair to hold another runner back, even your training partner.  Every race is different. Every runner is different.  Some days are your best race, and at marathon distance anything can change at any given minute.  

Mile 1: creeps up real fast, all I kept hearing in my head is Laura Howell saying you should feel like you are running the first half too slow, so I pull back the reigns. My Garmin (though battery charge complete was flashing when I put it on)  died at mile six, was reading 8:56...so I slowed back to a 10 minute mile. Thanks. Laura. J 

Mile 2 through 6.2 miles, pretty uneventful, just running with Lori and enjoying the race but wishing the crowd would thin out, doesn’t happen though until the half marathon turn off at mile 12.  Maintaining my slower pace, pretty evenly.  Happy with the pace that we are going, just enjoying the day. 

Mile 8:  In the mind of a marathoner, this one any way, I think only 18.2 more to go! Warped I know but just hold on, it gets better. 
Mile 10:  At the actual mile marker, a guy is laying on the ground, unconscious.  Someone is with him, but how terrifying,  we get on down the road and here the cops who are directing traffic for us calling for help.  Then we hear the ambulance,  not what we want to hear or see.

Mile 11: Just another mile

Mile 12: Here’s the split, half marathoners to the right, marathoners straight ahead.  The crowd thins and as we turn off we can hear the crowd cheering for those cheering for the finishers at the half marathon.  

Half marathon split 2:11.

Now the countdown to the 26.2 begins. 

The next few miles tend to speed by kind of like rapid fire. 

Miles 14 thru 18 and then I tend to get a little sad, only 8 miles left.

Mile 19, I start to wonder, am I going to hit the wall, face plant into it, not be able to finish the race?   Is my stomach going to flip?   Am I going to have to walk the finish?  Then I start to count my steps, 1,2,3,4,1,2,3,4.…yes, repetitious but its my step partner that keeps my breathing regulated.  

Mile 20 thru 24.2 and the whole reason I just love this race, the course and the people of Charlotte…at Mile 20 ½ there is “The Wall Party!”  There is a wall constructed for us to run through, with both sides of the road filled with cheering people, on the other side…starts the beer tables, Chocolate milk tables, random people with table of orange slices, strawberries.  Signs that read “ 26.2 because 26.3 would be insane”  and  “Chuck Norris never did a marathon”  and “Run faster so you can get the last Twinkie.”  The streets are colored with chalk all the way to Mile 23 ½.  The crowd is loud and cheering, they come from their houses and the reception is intoxicating, they make the whole race worth running.  There is music ranging from “Rocky Top” to the Rocky Theme Song, “Super Freak,” “Push It,” and those are just the ones I can remember.  

At Mile 24.2, a cop is holding a piece of typing paper with “Only 2 more miles” written on it.  I smiled. I can do this, Lori can do this.  We got this. We got this, it is almost over.  I feel like I can do anything, probably even fly… 

Mile 25 + a lady says up the hill and around the corner and you will see the finish.  I look at Lori and ask her if she can hear them, the cheering we can hear the finish line, everyone is waiting on all us crazy marathoners to finish. All of us crazy people who pay to torture ourselves, to ache after, to give up endless hours of our lives to be on the road in constant training, to sacrifice time with our families due to long runs and dedication to the sport…yes, all those at the finish line are the ones who support us crazy runner people,, they are cheering and waiting to celebrate with each of us whether a first time finisher or an old pro…each finish comes with a sense of accomplishment and a healthy dose of endorphins knows as the runners high.

Oh the sweet taste of adrenaline…

I can see the Finish Line, hear the crowd and then I hear my name…Pam Rodriguez from Elgin, SC, strong finish.  I crossed that finish line at 4:35 and though it was not my best marathon time, it was probably one of my proudest moments because I had had such a rough three weeks, my training had stopped mostly, and my stress level and anxiety were through the roof.  But when I hit the road on Saturday morning at 7:45 am, I had no expectation but just a strong desire to run and to smile which had been missing from my face for the last three weeks.  It was a care free few hours I had with my best friend and “sole sister” Lori. 

 After I crossed the finish line, got my blanket and medal, had my chip removed. I stopped and turned around to wait and watch Lori cross the finish line.  I rushed to her, walked with her to the snacks and water areas and got Nik to get her some ice for her knee.  We both had a great day.  

This marathon made my marathon total three for the year.  What a year is all I can say.

While we were standing at the finish I asked her if she was coming back to Charlotte next year, she said yes. I said that I was too.

The aftermath of this race has not been as bad as before.  Usually I need a lot of assistance post marathon, not this time.  I can walk up and downstairs, dress myself and put my own shoes on, sit Indian style and sit on the toilet without wincing!  All big pluses. I had no swelling post race, no stomach flip, no nausea, no joint pain and a lot of smiles and overload of endorphins.  

I love to run, as if it weren’t already apparent and I sincerely cannot wait to cross the next finish line, even if it is the imaginary one that is in front of my mailbox.  

Many thanks to my sweet supportive husband, who is a worry wart J but I wouldn’t have him be any other way.  He is always so proud of me, sometimes I think more than I am about my accomplishments.  He’s the love of my life and my biggest fan and cheerleader. I am one lucky girl. Thanks, Nik.

Post race, we go to our room, Lori and Greg in tow… I have a surprise. I had a cake made for us to celebrate.  It had a banner that had the name of the marathon and silhouettes of two runner girls with ponytails.  The front said “Sole Sisters 26.2” and along the bottom a quote that Lori had said to me when she was getting me through my first half marathon when I wanted to quit…”Pain is temporary, quitting is forever.”

After a brief rest, we all went to dinner at Vida, a great little restaurant in the Epicenter.  Then we ate cake…

I wouldn’t trade yesterday for the world, I needed that run and I needed my Sole Sister and our supportive husbands. What a great day and as I sit here and blog a twinkle in my eye and a grin on my lips, I am happy, anxiety has subsided and soreness is minimal.     

Everything happens for a reason, people come into our lives for a purpose, not by accident and I know for a fact…running can change your life. It has mine. 

Back to basics eating...

With racing season being in full gear, life in full swing and honestly going way too fast, I am a firm believer in questioning everything as of late which led to a discovery that in apart had changed the way  I treat my body.  Do not misconstrue what was just typed as that I will be backing down from training which couldn't be further from the truth, quite the opposite.  What I meant was the fuel that I will be putting in to my body has changed drastically.

I have not always had the healthiest relationship with food, so I am not one who has to have great taste and for years my meals consisted of protein shakes and bars throughout the day and one "whole food" meal at night for dinner. In doing this to myself, I started to encounter stomach issues, skin issues and energy issues.  So I started reading ingredients and evaluating what I was doing with the "nutrients" that I was ingesting.  Upon evaluating, I started to look at energy levels in my workouts and figuring out what would be conducive to  my lifestyle, cost, availability and convenience.  

Upon such discovery I decided to dive, head first into Paleo.  It is a concept of eating whole foods, non-processed food. Meats, vegetables and fruits, and seeds and nuts.   Basically a high fat, low carb diet, devoid of grains, sugar, dairy, gluten where foods are in their purest form.  

In this quest for a balance in my life, I have been trying a different vegetable weekly to not get bored but to also broaden my choices.  So far I have tried and might I add liked the following new foods:
Spaghetti squash
Butternut squash
Eggplant 
Beet Chips
Kale
Walnuts
Almond butter
Sunbutter


The internet is a huge help with finding recipes as not to get easily tired and new seasonings for meats and salads and veggies.

Some perks I have already noticed following:

• Once I detoxed off caffeine and sugar, I haven't had a craving for it.
• I gave up dairy, but the other day decided I was going to have a bit on a pizza and was doubled over with stomach craps, and bloated immediately.  Not worth eating cheese!
• I had my cycle, which before my nutrition evaluation was completely ridiculous and painful. When I had it this past month, no pain, no cramps, only knew it was on the way because I track it.  
• My race times have improved.
• Recovery time has diminished.
• and biggest perk...Abdominal muscles are showing.

Let me reiterate that following the Paleo plan is not easy nor is it cheap but it is definitely worth it. It takes a lot of planning, prep work and cooking.  Organization is a must.  

Most Mondays I spend cooking my food for the week.  It is well worth the time as I am never tempted to just raid the fridge because I have healthy options available. Planning is a must.  

Anybody who is reading this blog already knows my personality, I have no gray area, so I am extreme in every aspect of my life. So if you are interested in trying this way of eating don't beat yourself up if you slip, but you will definitely feel the difference if you do. 

Nik teases me and calls me granola but whatever, I feel better than I have in a long time.  I have started making my own chicken stock, growing herbs, planning our vegetable garden for next summer and our compost pile.  

I'm pretty excited to just be able to go outside and grab fresh vegetables.  It is definitely going to be an adventure. I am excited and looking forward to starting new thing, trying even more new foods.  We now shop the perimeter of the grocery store. 

Here are some of my favorite websites and blogs for doable Paleo recipes..

www.fastpaleo.com
www.paleodietlifestyle.com
www.paleomg.com
www.paleocavemandietrecipes.com

First the trail, then the road and the power of positive people...i heart running....

Another two races in one weekend, not the same day but equally as taxing having raced 16.2 miles total, one 10 mile Xterra trail and a 10k road race.    I know it doesn’t sound like much, however, when done close together but having downtime between, two days to be exact, soreness has time to creep in.  I prefer double racing the same day.  

Davidson, North Carolina had me salivating as we were driving to the race venue, the streets had people being active, runner, cyclists, bike lanes, side walks.  Oh if only we were so lucky here, there were other road races going on during the time that I was doing the trail. It is a beautiful place. I cannot wait to go back next year.  It reminded me of Cary, NC.

The trail course was beautiful as always it is, well what I can see usually looking down or else I will end up flat on my face, trippage, is inevitable.  This trail was different in that it was dryer than the previous trails that I have been on.  The other thing that stood out was that it was like being on a rollercoaster and jumping over thing in the path, made for an interesting event.  The venue was so quaint, it started in what looked like someone’s yard.  Set up crew was great.  

This race differed for me as well because, I was determined to run the whole thing.  It is really hard to start back once I stop on any kind of race, but trails especially, I haven’t figured out why yet, maybe just the break in concentration and focus.  Two weeks ago on a previous double race day, the first one of its kind for me, I had done a 10K where I had determined that I was running the whole thing, the end. I was able to and finished faster than I thought. So, 10 miles, I can do this.  I did.  

My trail experience is so limited, being very new to trail but loving the challenge all the same, improvements are being seen each time. If I am smiling after, it was a good race.  I was beaming.  

My first trail, which I am completely nuts insert disclaimer here, was a half marathon. Yes, what was I thinking, in July, the 8th to be exact and when temperatures are well over 100 degrees. I just counted, that was 8 weeks ago, holy crap. Well, Saturday’s was my fourth one, good gosh. 

Now I just really got excited, literally…adrenaline junky, who me? Haha! 
Following is the reason for my excitement: 

Date     Race                               Finish Time
July 8 -     Harbison Xterra SC 13.1       3:02
July 15     Xterra NC Whitewater  12K   1:45
August 18 6.2 mile Trail Challenge Whitewater 1:02
September 1 Xterra NC 10 miler Fisher Farm 2:05

I get obsessed by certain things and have to see the progress, poor Nik.
I just squealed, silly I know but, I love competition, against who, myself.  I want to improve me and I am.    My times aren’t anywhere near good and I have a really high expectation of myself, there is always room for improvement. 

Which brings me to my next race but a realization all the same. I went with my friend Lori and her daughter.  Katy was running her first 10k this morning.  I know how I felt when my daughter and niece ran with me, it is a special moment. I had agreed to sign up, the race was for the fallen soldiers charity, so a great cause for a holiday run.  

It was hot today, but it is September in South Carolina, could be 70 degrees, could be 110.  It was a hot run, no shade, and I admit I was sore, more sore than I had thought.  But whatever, this run was just for fun and to support Katy running her first race and a great way to spend a holiday morning. I also had had way to much fun at the Latin Festival yesterday so I was hungover running it as well, yes I admit it. I indulged way too much on Sunday.  Woke up at 3am to take ibuprofen for my pounding skull and electrolyte tablets to help me over the hump.  I know better but, needed to let my hair down a little bit, having not had a drink since May. Any way. I didn't die, lesson learned maybe. Moving on...

What made today even more special was that I got to see so many people I haven’t seen in so long. Everybody is so busy for whatever reason, I am, just with life and living it.  I ran into so many people, but oddly enough we just picked up where we left off.  Everyone seemed to be fairing well, as was evident by the smiles on their faces.  It truly was a good day.  Being surrounded by some of the most positive people I know, and have the privilege to know, makes life a lot more enjoyable.  Let me explain.  Athletes of all levels were there today.  Honestly, they cheer just as loudly for the last place as the first place. Why?  Because it took the last person as much if not more work to get to the start line as it did the first place person.  I am always encouraged by this group of people.  The power of positive people, changes lives… 

And I just found out I got 3rd in my Age Group (35-39) this morning. Katy, Lori’s daughter finished first in her age group.  

Living life to it's fullest everyday...having more smile lines than frown lines, and sparkling eyes...what a great life I have.