A First Double Dip: Playing Duck Hunt, ditching the Garmin 305, relaxing for the end is in clear view, and pushing forward…

A Double Dip:


August 18, 2012




Racing two races in two different states in one day, insane, yes probably.   Just what the adrenaline junkie needed, oh yeah.  (Still on the endorphin high from yesterday.)

Well my first adventure was at the Charlotte Whitewater Center, the event:  10K Trail Challenge.  Race start time was 8:30, we drove up that morning leaving the house at 6:15.  The usual breakfast of eggs, sunbutter and a rice cake accompanied by a large glass of water.  

All things packed for race the night before including my camelbak.  Ever since the Xterra Half Marathon in July, where the water stop ran out of water, I do not do a trail race without my trusty pack, no matter the distance.  

The race starts, temperature is 66 degrees, pretty much perfect.  The sun is hidden behind the fog and clouds that are starting to burn off and the shade from the trees makes the temperature upon entering the trail even cooler.  As with any run, the body heats up quickly so no extra clothes needed.  Music blaring at the start was hair metal….oh yeah…going to be a great race.  

Having still only done a couple trail races, literally two, I always allow for extra time just because I have to have a goal, which was 1 hour 20 minutes.  (I didn’t realize how much my Garmin was limiting me, I just wear a watch now, it helps me relax and just enjoy what I am doing, at the moment.)  

The race was pretty uneventful, the scenery was beautiful as always, however, trail racing requires focus to be on the ground and not really looking around as fall are inevitable.  I could hear crickets all around me, frogs, and just the sounds that are so relaxing, they bring a smile to my face.  This race was different for me, I had decided I was not going to walk, I was going to push further than I had before. Convince the mind that the body is willing, and I did.  I ran the whole thing. My mantra was: relax and enjoy the moment, you are doing what you love, breathe, relax, repeat. 

 I also fell in love with my Brooks PureGrits.  Charlotte trails are slick red clay, even slicker due to the rain we have had lately.  Rooty, rocky, steep climbs, mostly single track with several jumps involved, my shoes made a huge difference, my footing was certain, and no foot pain today.  

Even more proud was I that I had finished the race in 1:02, 18 minutes faster than I had allowed myself. 

It was a great morning.  

Part Two

I had seen an add for the Springdale 5k advertised and I had always wanted to try it, so Friday afternoon I signed up. What the world was I thinking?  I was thinking that I am in marathon training and what better way to get my mileage in with other people so that I would push myself harder. Yes that is my thought process, and yes it worked.   

Last night 6:45pm, 90 degrees, no trees to block the brutal sun, grass on a horse track, no spring in my step and three water stops for a 5k, it was hot.  

I was surprised at the start, my friend Cindy was there and her husband, Kevin.  We walked over to the start and in true Pam fashion, I had not even bothered to look at any course map.  Oh well it is just for fun, it was flat, not my favorite, but it was on anything but asphalt so yahoo!

I saw a ton of folks I hadn’t seen in a while, got to chat a bit. We lined up and the race started, garminless I have no clue where I am, time wise, I was just running.  The first loop was done, water stop, sip water, pour over head. Next mile, done, sip water, pour overhead.  

Approaching the last mile, I am going to play Duck Hunt.  Coach G would say there’s your rabbit, chase it, catch it, pass it.  I played Duck Hunt instead.  The finish is in sight, plain view, push and pass.  Target in sight, aim, explode, pass, repeat…next.  I continued until I was crossing the line.  

As we were leaving the last race Nik asked me how I had liked double dipping, I said I loved it! It definitely will not be the last. We headed by Food Lion because I wanted peanut butter ice cream, and then we were couch bound! 

About an hour later I get a text from Cindy, saying that I had won first place age group for the Springdale 5k.  She had my trophy! I was elated.  She had won third place herself! 

Today as I looked at the standings from yesterday, I had finished 6th in my age group in the Charlotte 10k Trail Race and 1st place AG at the Springdale 5K cross country race.  Not too shabby, but was all for fun.

I am thankful everyday to have a supportive husband who always is with me at the races, waiting for me to finish, who carts me around from race to race.  Sometimes I think he is more proud than I am, in fact I know he is. 

The one thing I am certain about, I love running, I love the challenge,  I love the feeling of crossing finish lines, I love the discipline it takes to get to the start lines.  When training for runs, nothing can be substituted for running.  

Through running I have learned more about myself.  Running allows me freedom - mentally, spiritually and physically.  Finding my love for running, is one of the best things that has ever happened to me. Having support system at home is priceless.  

Two races, two states in one day…what a great way to spend a Saturday.  

Xterra NC - 6 days after the first, No watch=no limitations!

July 14, 2012

Start of Xterra NC 

The days of road running may be closer to an end than I thought.  I quite possibly may have replaced it with trails. Much more serene, laid back and more mentally challenging than ever, I never thought in my old age that I would be drawn back to the days of my childhood of playing in the woods. I thought I had outgrown such things that I would refer to as simple.  It is so nice to feel like I am playing and due to the fact that everything I do is for such a long amount of time, playing is a wonderful thing. 


Well this trail race is number two in my whole four times on a true trail, why not make the fourth another race, another longish race.  Like my thought process? To me if I am not challenged, uncomfortable and out of my zone of comfort, I feel like I am wasting time. 


I digress for just a paragraph or two.  When I was young, I had my first child, I was seventeen.  Until a few years ago my life revolved around my children. The older they get, the more freedom I have to explore.  I get to go back and do the thing that I didn't get to do years ago. Now I am more daring, fearless, and throw caution to the wind. 


Trail running (and I am just a novice with a lot of grit) has taught me already that I am smarter than I thought. Who knew I would be able to run, while trail marker spotting, watching all around me and managing to not fall this time in completely foreign areas. Trail is one time that I am not worried about speed, just enjoying myself.  I set out and have in my mind what I would like to do but if it doesn't happen not the end of the world.  The first Xterra, I only missed my goal by 2 minutes, the second one (because I had no watch) I beat by 15 minutes. Let me just say that the trail at Harbison is technically more challenging than the Whitewater Center in Charlotte, however the red clay and the fact that it had rained all week in Charlotte made caution flags come up regularly during the race. 


I had the privilege to see a gray fox run across the trail and a wasp nest that stopped me dead in my tracks because I couldn't figure out if the tree had a fungus or if it was a nest, nest it was. Any run I do is a privilege, I do not take it for granted. 


We began the trek up to Charlotte's Whitewater Center. Having no clue that the destination was closer than we thought, near the airport, we left early to give us plenty of time. It was foggy and I was thinking great, rain and Nik and Irma would be outside waiting on me. We arrived. Small group as I had expected, all different ages, all extremely fit. I get my packet, pin on my number and wait. The set up group, Dirty Spokes, did a fantastic job. Start and finish ended at this covered area where bathrooms and changing rooms were attached. Eased my mind a bit, at least they would be sheltered if there was rain. The clouds start to burn off and the sun appears, start time is near.  My goal was two hours for this race but guess what I had forgotten, my watch, so I was just going to go.


Ready, set, GO! 


All of us loop into the woods, and then come to a screeching halt. Single track, no passing, should have staggered the race for those who are faster and want to place. Walking continued for a bit and then we were off.  Miles one and two, I am thinking that I have lost my mind completely, my muscles are tired.  I blow it off.  There are two distances in the race, the shorter distance is running with us and turns off at mile three. I can hear the crowd cheering and have to go the opposite direction, gah! We had been told at the start that if we chose to take the shorter route and were signed up for the longer distance that we would get a DNF (did not finish) and nope, not happening, unless I had to be hauled out and listen I would put up a good fight. 


I shook off mile three turn off and trudge along, where the trail is all red clay and boulders, roots too numerous to count and dips and ruts and drop offs that required jumping and did I mention that it had rained all week. Rain all week and red clay with steep descents equals slippery terrain. We had been also warned to "Embrace the Suck" of certain parts of the race which ended up not being less difficult than Harbison, maybe because I was prepared for the worst. The funniest part was the mile stretch called "The Toilet Bowl" which spiraled down and at the bottom was an old toilet. "Goat Hill" was supposed to be the most challenging part however, compared to "Spider woman" in Harbison, not so much.  


Along the way I met a lady, Nancy was her name, aged 57 years. (I am learning every time I do something that age is merely a number.) Along the route she and I discussed many things, her two full Ironman finishes within the last 3 years, her many half ironman finishes, two completions of marathons, her taking up stand up paddle boarding last year, about her husband who is an incredible athlete (seriously 3 time Kona qualifying under his belt) and their 34 year old son and grand children. She told me about vacationing in Guatemala and roasting marshmallows over the volcano coals. We both talked about how we wished we had done the shorter distance so we would feel like playing at the center after (we both said playing simultaneously).  She said turn around I need to see your hair, and then squealed, we both had braided ponytails, she said our meeting was meant to be. Throughout the course she told me I could pass, I told her nope, I'm just gonna ride in your back pocket and ride in her back pocket is what I did. Over and under and through the trail until we see the parking lot, the covered area and the finish! Yahoo! Yahoo except the finish ends up a gravel road, embrace the suck! 


Well, I finished, yet another one, and a third is already in sight. Mentally taxing, cruelly demanding on the body, more sweat than can be fathomed and memories that will last a lifetime. 


When I am on trail, I feel like a kid, so free and though there is a determination in my eye there is also a twinkle there, a spark and a swell of pride that is immeasurable.

My friend, Nancy and  me at the finishing

Oh the lure of the trail...

Xterra, Hunger Games, Grit Prevails, again...

Embarked on another new adventure yesterday, Xterra Trail Series Harbison Race, a challenging trail half-marathon, that is HILLY!!


Always searching for a new challenge, new territory to explore and as a fellow adrenaline junky said " you live the life of - Do something that makes you uncomfortable everyday - I think she summed me up pretty well.


When we sit still, we become stagnant and you know what stagnant does? Smells bad, grows algae and mold and attracts mosquitoes, hmmm? Chew on that for a bit, I choose not to just be, thanks.


Here is the elevation chart:

And I love hills. Well, got up, had breakfast, filled my camelbak (which would be a lifesaver), removed my first aid kit (dumb idea), added in my sports beans w/o caffeine, packed my post race beer, knee socks, braided hair and bandanna.  Ready to roll to Harbison Park!


Excitement is looming but to digress for just a sec to Saturday afternoon.  Nik and I went to HalfMoon Outfitters to pick up my packet because I was borderline losing my mind from having to rest, then decided to eat at Mellow Mushroom (yummo) and then head home.


As we are eating lunch I get a text from Lori that read, "picked up my packet, going to church tonight in case I die tomorrow, I'm good." May have been the best text I ever received.  My friend Lori is a devout Catholic, sometimes I call her to ask her to cut church on Sunday to run with me.  She does but usually will attend on Saturday instead of cutting church all together.  My two best friends are polar opposites and let me tell you there is never a dull moment. Here's Melinda, we are in Puerto Rico of course already drinking and she looks down the beach and sees something that looks like a baptism going on.  What does my friend do? In a bikini, beer in hand, has to go see what's going on. Those two girls mean the world to me. 


We are definitely a motley crew. So we are off at the start after having to walk 2 miles to the start, I mean seriously that is a long walk, (go ahead and laugh) and then once we get there, yeah only a two stall bathroom for all us women who are well hydrated meaning we all have to pee.  Well we started off by peeing in the woods before the race started because they were calling us all to line up for the official start and National Anthem. Follow red flags through the trail in the forest and we are off!!!


It was all our first trail race, I had signed up a while ago, then Melinda signed and then Lori and what an adventure we were about to have.  First thing I notice at the start of the race, trail races are small scale, I would assume because of safety issues and traffic on course, and everyone seemed nice. Trails are marked with red flags, like landscaping flags, miles are not marked every mile, thank god, and aid stations are fewer than road races.


The first few miles were just getting a feel for what was going on around me, meaning, narrow trail, rocks, roots, pinestraw, sand, red clay, trying to find footing while making sure I was paying attention to what was overhead, beside me and below me. Trail is much more than mindless running where I can just zone out and go through the motion of running. On trail, focus is key, so being aware of everything even remembering to drink was taxing on me.  (I forgot to mention that at 6 am yesterday the temperature was 80 degrees.)  I am running along and here comes Lori, she had fallen skinned up both knees. Poor thing was bleeding. Kept running, we met a guy who was talking Lori's ears off, I didn't talk much, I don't usually unless I need distraction. The landscape out there was so beautiful, untouched somewhat, downed trees that I must confess I wanted to walk across of dance like "Dirty Dancing" but I had to stay on task.  


Running on through narrow winding trails, getting to watch the sun come up during the beginning, not too much can be better, well damn that root jumped up and grabbed my foot and wham, I am falling not regaining footing, falling...slide, ouch. I regroup, look around, nobody was insight, scraped thigh, knee and elbow. I get up and start again.  Here comes Lori, I said I fell too! We both laughed. So we are running on and come upon these ruts where we have to kind of bounce from one leg to the other to get through this part.   Lori said that she was glad she had been playing Dance Dance Revolution because those dance moves were helping  her out. I said well I'm being a ninja on Ninja Warrior. We both laugh and trudge on. 


Curiosity was killing Lori about where we were and in my experience with trail, usually I don't want to know as on trail, distance is hard to judge. Well we get to a mile marker 3ish is what it said, I swear it was more like 6 but 3ish it is. Moving on, miles passed, water stops passed, people passed, we passed people, water stops without water were passed, direct sunshine was encountered. Dear lord it was hot and Lori and I start having delirious conversations.  I said I feel like I'm on a reality show, she said, the Hunger Games, and we are waiting on the storms and wild animals, because at the moment we are in baking sun. We laugh and keep  going.  I look at her and tell her if she never speaks to me again after this race I completely understand.


Then we are at mile 9, I think. The sweetest children in the world helped us, no I wasn't hallucinating, we were at a waterstop and these kids filled up my camelbak and were so attentive. We met a couple from Ireland there. I told Lori we just met a leprechaun, she said yep, our good luck. 

Dave and Me

Mile 11. Only two more to go and them .1ish.  There was a lot if "ish" out on trail, ish. :) Then there was 12 and 13. The course was wrapped around and looped and curved that when you were on one trail you would see the next, very deceiving as it appeared the end was nearer than it was in actuality. ("Is this real life?")  The cars, the finish and the gazebo were in plain view however the red flags did not lead me to it, they lead me parallel and cross ways beside. I had met up with a guy named Dave out there. I said to him that if I could I would cut straight across this and just go to the finish but I wouldn't be able to live with myself for cheating. 


Then the field we had started in, the finish clock is somewhere ahead of me, I scream, "Where the hell do we go?" And I am told to run straight for the clock, I proceed. I hear Nik, calling my name. I finished.  I finished my first (it will not be my last) Xterra Half-marathon.


Lori, Melinda and I finish within minutes of each other. We all hugged, got our shirts, laughed about experiences on the trail.


The Coldplay song "Fix You" was playing at the end. What a great Sunday, to spend with my best girls, three supportive husbands and children in tow.  Beer in the truck and Hudson's BBQ for lunch and  yes we went to lunch dirty, smelly and still drenched in sweat, and we wore our Xterra shirts to boot.

Lori, Me and Melinda

The greatest friendships are built on the road and even better ones on the trail. Another one down, everyone survived, grit prevailed, again.


By the way...they are both still speaking to me. :)


 Until next time...happy trails to you until we meet again!

COLDPLAY 

"Fix You"

When you try your best but you don't succeed

When you get what you want but not what you need

When you feel so tired but you can't sleep

Stuck in reverse

And the tears come streaming down your face

When you lose something you can't replace

When you love someone but it goes to waste

Could it be worse?

Lights will guide you home

And ignite your bones

And I will try to fix you

And high up above or down below

When you're too in love to let it go

But if you never try you'll never know

Just what you're worth

Lights will guide you home

And ignite your bones

And I will try to fix you

Tears stream down your face

When you lose something you cannot replace

Tears stream down your face

And I will try to fix you

Tears stream down your face

I promise you I will learn from my mistakes

Tears stream down your face

And I will try to fix you

Lights will guide you home

And ignite your bones

And I will try to fix you...

Knee socks, a trail, and a camelpak…Oh MY! On-On!

Well, who would have thought I could find something else to entertain all my spare time, because I have so much. I did, and it is called trail running.  The lure of trail is something so new to me and so intriguing, almost difficult to put into words. 


Imagine this, no matter the temperature, time of day, due to shade and the ever so faithful camelpak, running is doable. Imagine having to be so focused in the moment, that thoughts can not veer, your mind cannot wander, the focus is straight ahead, the next marking, the tree root underfoot, snake or rock or downed tree, limb overhead, or drop off. Imagine it, being constantly in the moment, no cars sounds, no music, only nature.

Poetry in motion. I never thought I would be observant enough to run trail.  Here is a phrase that came out of my mouth during a recent trail run with my friend, "Stay behind me, I will keep us on trail." Weirdest thing because I, in the past, would have never dared take the lead. Pretty proud moment actually.

Embarking on a new adventure, always makes me giddy and if it be difficult, all the better.  It makes my poor husband nervous, but we bartered this time.  I will keep my phone in  my camelpak, which is so nifty it has pockets to keep stuff, and that I will check in throughout the race Sunday. I also keep it with me when I'm on trail, poor guy. I have been told by a dear friend that I am a lot to handle. Whatevs!

Oh this always happens, I blog about it and start daydreaming about being on the hill in Sesqui that I call the stairs. (Insert pout here.) I wish I was there right now instead of taking the afternoon off so I can go to the gm in the morning.

Then there is this group of the most delightful drinkers with a running problem that I have been so fortunate to encounter. They are the Hashers. Every other Saturday and on opposing Sundays and on Full Moons, a group of knee sock wearing, beer drinking folks, show up at the designated spot, at the determined time and trail run from one stop to the next. The Hounds chase a Hare through the trail that the hare has marked, watching for symbols, signs, toilet paper, and the most wonderful one, BN or Bcheck. It is all in good fun, which is what I want to do, have fun and wear knee socks.

Happy Trails!

On-On!

NFHN Pam :)

The Crusher Run, My Momma and a First Place AG Finish!

My Momma and Me - Pre Race

 
Titled the most challenging foot race of it's type in South Carolina, The Olympia Crusher Run, through the granite mine, down in and up and out, 3.8 miles, 375 feet below sea level. Yeah buddy!

To have been such a small event, the precursor to the Olympia festival, a few people, 190 participants, headed to the start line. I had no clue what I was in for except that I knew the ending was touted to be steep and the entire race on gravel and sand. Sounded pretty fantastic to me, why not?











At the start, fantastic hair metal was playing, the master of ceremonies was wearing a fake mustache and looked like a circus ringmaster, I was looking for his whip and lion. The group was eclectic, some familiar faces and being there without someone running with me, I actually socialized. Close your mouth, I know, shocker, but I did.


The start was flat, about .3 miles of it and the epic downhill battle began,  controlling not flying the hill but also watching knees and ankles on gravel, and fear of falling. Quad burnout could be detrimental, because the climb out, people there is no other way out. Down, down, down to the bottom and then back up, focus in front or I would be defeated at the mountainous terrain ahead. Just do the damn thing, is all I could do.

Well I finished, had no clue where I was time wise, I did hear Kick Start my Heart playing when I finished.  When Jeremy said stay for the awards. I stayed and guess what, I took first place in age group. I had fun, My Momma was there to cheer me on, my husband was ecstatic at home.

The Crusher Run was important to me and kind of a landmark race per say:
1) Nik didn't take me.
2) My Momma went with me to watch me race for the first time.
3) I had no goal except to have fun.
4) Hold on to your seat...I didn't wear my Garmin 305.
5) the distance was shorter than I usually run.

RESULTS: http://quarrycrusherrun.com/results2012.txt

http://www.thestate.com/2012/04/18/2239282/get-a-chance-to-run-in-columbias.html

Elevation

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         Time (h:m:s)             Distance (mi)     

Marathon Number 2

Myrtle Beach Marathon
February 18, 2012




It was finally here, my second marathon.  26.2 miles on the open road with thousands of people.  No rain, snow, freezing rain, sleet…just hot sun.  


Nik and I got up at 4:00 am to head to the start line with our friends Laura and Greg Howell (who I swear is part Kenyan.)  We walk because the start is so close and parking would be such a pain and just to warm up a tad. 


National Anthem is sung, crank chairs start and we are off…what lies ahead of me turned out to be a battle of wills, digging deep and an angel that appeared somewhere between mile 18 to 20 who’s name is Laura…


To begin with my Garmin would not locate satellite, I am too dependent on it as I soon found out. Something else I learned is that when you taper and eat, you feel like a million bucks which for me equals, you got it…crash and burn. But like the phoenix I pulled myself up and finished the damn thing.


I was just going, felt great, top of the world, mile 1, mile 2...and so on to pass the 13.1 cut off, feeling good, then mile 15 at 2:05. Holy crap. It hits me, I know what I have done. Let the meltdown begin.  As I turn the corner to mile 15, I felt it, impending doom as if I had stopped dead in my tracks everything had become slow motion. I had been running my half marathon pace and guess what I was doing the full. I experienced it, the wall, the legs would no longer cooperate, the lungs were fine, the heart was good. Thank goodness I have plenty of “heart”  and could not get my hands on a cell phone. 


Guess what I did. (Now it is sort of funny but Saturday morning it was not funny at all.) I sat down on the curb of the route and started to cry.  Yep, me, Miss Strong, Determined, Bull headed, Run loving girl, me. I sobbed. I knew what I had done and not only that but I knew that I had 11.2 miles to go. 


Let me explain that 11.2 miles is a long way in a full marathon even on a perfect day.  Today was not that for me and I wanted to quit but guess what…I didn’t quit, I finished. 
When I sat on the curb I realized just how much I had done myself in by going out too hard.  My legs would not cooperate, I felt every muscle, every tendon, every joint in my body hurt. Then, hello nausea. I started to dry heave, while still crying. That was real pretty.


Then, there was music from a band or radio station or something and it started playing U2. Sorry to offend but I don’t particularly care for U2 and the lyrics “I still haven’t found what I’m looking for” starts to blare. Well no crap, I want my legs back and the pace I had maintained.  That song added fuel to the fire and irritated me to say the least but I had to get away from it.  So I dug deep and started back to jog, walk shuffle, walk, I never crawled but it did cross my mind. I even did the zig zag walk from being dizzy. Lo and behold out of nowhere a guy comes running by with music playing, Motley Crue, “Kick Start my Heart.”  I mustered up a smile, that song helped me through the next mile. 


A little further down the road, I’m moving a little faster or so I thought, cruel joke the body and mind can play on you, glanced at my garmin pace 13:45.  That was all I had in me. Then I met Jeremy and George. I ran with them for a bit, not sure how long as there are periods of the day that I cannot recollect. We passed each other along the way many  times. Jeremy was a clown, George the serious runner who was support team for his friend.  I listened to the bicker back and forth, laughed with them and kept trudging forward.  


It literally took me and hour to trek the next 3 miles. Then I finally saw mile 18.  There was a sign that said “Run like Zombies are chasing you!”  I would sure have been zombie food, if a rabid dog had been chasing me on Saturday, he would have eaten me too. 


At Mile 18, there was this turn around, and I swear I wanted to cheat and cut, I didn’t but gees it was enticing.  It was as if there was a force field to zap even more energy from us, all the runners were now walking. Maybe we were in the Arena, unaware. (“Hunger Games” in case you didn’t know!) 


Then I’m still walk/running less than a jog, when, smack on the butt, and I hear “good game” it was Laura Howell.  She asked me was I ok, I said no, explained what had happened early on. I tried to get her to leave me but she wouldn’t. Miles 18, 19, 20 I don’t remember so much except that we were anticipating the next water stop as we were reduced to walking through each one. I remember at one of those stops, I started having a stabbing pain in my abs, made me immediately nauseous again.  I am doubled over again, gagging. She still wouldn’t leave me. 


Then came the mirage. We couldn’t discern where we were, first aid station coming up or water stop. The marker flags were the same color, cruel joke, unthought-of detail, I don’t know but for us it was like a mirage in the desert.  The temperature Saturday wasn’t supposed to be much over 50 or so but by the time we finished the temperature was nearly 70 degrees. Both Laura and I were dressed for colder temperatures, she in long sleeves, me in long pants.    Water….I think.


When we got to mile 22, there were oranges. I swear those were the best oranges I have ever eaten. Funny thing is (now it’s funny) when I got my orange slice I started to flip it out, I dropped it. I must have had this look on my face like a little kid who drops her ice cream cone, I was tearing up, Laura said I will get you another one, but the volunteer darted to get me one. I had it on the side of my face, wiped my hands on my pants. Best thing I have ever eaten. 


Then we get to mile 23, I asked Laura if I could swim the 3.1 miles instead of run it.  We both laughed. Deep down I was serious and my brain was gone. 


At mile 25, in Market Commons, I heard, there she is, it was My friend Laura and her husband David. I was so happy she was there but stayed away from her because I knew I would have crumbled had I hugged her. I just wanted to be finished.  


THEN THE FINAL 1.1 Miles.  


Just the last bit and we are done. Laura and I can hear the spectators, see the finish line.  Laura screams there’s Melinda. I see her smiling and screaming. Then I see Nik, I just want to grab him. I see Greg. I see the finish line and the clock and Laura is beside me and we finish together.  


I hugged her and thanked her for Saturday, from around mile 18 on I needed her.  I just remember telling her over and over I hurt. Every part of me hurt.  She was hurting too but she never told me, she towed me in.  Saturday, she was my angel, just teamwork is what she said.  We got across the finish line together.  Cadence…


I have never been so happy to see the end of a race.  I had forgotten how bad a marathon hurts, almost like childbirth. Pain is forgotten and you do it again.  


Let me further explain, I was so terribly crushed by my performance on Saturday, I am my worst critic. No one expects anything from me but me. That is what makes me tick, my drive, my determination, my sheer will, grit.


I hurt. I cried. I beat myself up. But I learned that nobody else was disappointed in me, only I was. Everyone else was proud of me, what I had done, just the accomplishment and pushing through that day. 


My sweet Nik helped me get off my clothes back at the hotel, helped me get into a bath, took a nap. He tried stretching my ankles for me, tears started rolling down my face. He stopped, hugged me and said no more.  I said  back no more what? He said marathons and then he retracted that and smiled, and he hugged me.  I told him that I had forgotten how bad the last one hurt, he told me the last one was worse.  I don’t think so but how can I judge, he’s the one who takes care of me afterward so I am certain he knows better than I. 


Well my next one is in three weeks. We shall see how much I forget by then, probably not enough but I will get through it.  


On to the next one…March 10.